Keep Your Eye on the Ball
Golf Print of a Bygone Tournament
Second golf print in a series
As mentioned elsewhere, I’m a terrible golfer. My swing looks like I’m trying to chop down a tree.
Putting is my … er, ‘gift’.
I’ve infuriated scores of people with my ‘mid-stride, one-handed polo swing, whilst eating a sandwich, spraying crumbs all over the place, talking with my mouth full, Miracle Putt’ from 35 yards short of the green. With a driver…for par.
People hate that. They think I’m hustling them.
But I think the Taoists have it right (or do I mean Buddhists?); it’s complete detachment from outcome, born of a complete lack of ability. I don’t care, because I have no ambition to be any good at this dashed game, and more often than not, I’m there under duress anyways.
Come to think of it, maybe golf is like dating: the harder you try, the worse you do.
In Olden Times (in the pre-Colonel epoch) whenever I’d hose myself off and shave and coif and hit the favored nightspots, I must’ve been trying too hard, because I’d invariably end up doing the wallflower routine. But on other occasions where I’d find myself participating in revels, unshaven, unbathed, and with ‘hat-head’ (and I don’t blame your skepticism) the odd gal would actually flip her hair and sip coquettishly!
Of course, I would spoil everything by putting a foot in my mouth, or she’d flee at the sight of my finger-pointing Travolta-dancing, but the point is that if I cared/tried at golf, I’m sure my putting would stink as much as the rest of my game…”
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